Finding The Real Reasons You Are Stuck In Life
Lisa Linfield is a Wealth Manager, sought after Keynote Speaker, Podcast Host of Working Women’s Wealth and Course Creator that partners with women around the world to change their mindset and help them make money, invest it, and protect it from life’s unexpected turns.
Today, Lisa talks about her book Deep Grooves: Overcoming Patterns That Keep You Stuck.
What We Discuss with Lisa Linfield:
- The book as part of her strategy for launching a new conversation
- How the deep grooves start to reveal itself
- How the different voices of the world shape us
- How our assumptions become our identity
- Your signposts towards your best life
- How to reverse these grooves
- The writing process
[01:19] The Impetus Behind Writing Her Book
In this journey for wealth, people think that the answer lies in a spreadsheet, but the real secret of wealth comes down to how you think.
Your thinking is what determines your success.
While people think they need the step by step plan as to how to do something, it’s really about how you think about your work, what you do about the money, and what you have about the people around you. And Lisa thinks she can’t do any justice to that in any other format – but a book.
[03:50] How the Deep Grooves Start to Reveal Itself
The idea behind her book Deep Grooves is that we somehow fall into these patterns. There are times you think you’re out of the groove and just when you think you’ve got it all under control, it comes back and back to you at a deeper level and a deeper level.
We believe and have grown up believing and that the world out there has told us to believe it. And we accepted it as the truth.
Our brain doesn’t retrospectively go back and refilter and refile. When you’re a little kid, the thinking part of your brain isn’t even fully formed yet. So it can’t even argue with that emotional irrational fight or flight instinct.
Our whole brain is full of shortcuts and just by an instinctive response, trigger, boom, or something that happens, you find yourself right back in the groove again.
[08:32] How the Different Voices of the World Shape Us
The world has these voices that shape our life, our future, our past, and who we are. Even social media shapes us every single day of our life. They shape our expectations of ourselves and our standard of life.
We find ourselves stuck in this groove of what the world out there tells us how life should look like.
Then we take this path that we should all be on. So any variation to the path becomes a failure in our mind or it becomes our sense of pride as to how well we’re exceeding the path. But it’s completely the wrong path to the wrong destination for each of us as unique human beings.
[12:29] How Our Assumptions Become Our Identity
Our subconscious processes at 11 million bits per second, and our conscious processes at 50 bits per second. They are these inbuilt identity statements that we hold about ourselves, no matter how much we say otherwise.
When you commit to doing something that you just didn’t get done, there was fundamentally an underlying identity statement, a deep groove, a deep pattern that you held that was blocking this.
Then we start to look at these things and look at our sense of identity. Some of it comes from our family, our classmates, our school, social media, whatever it is.
Unless we go and take that out, we will never be able to change our behavior or how we think about whatever it is that we want to change in our life – be it relationships, money, whatever it is.
[16:38] The Signposts Towards Your Best Life
We all hold a deep intuition. There is always this small voice of wisdom, call it the sense in your gut or a knocking on your head, call it however, there is always the stump, the little angel on your shoulder, whatever your analogy is for it.
One of the worst stories the world out there has taught us is that we must listen only to the voice of the world out there. Unless it resonates with facts and logic, it doesn’t exist.
But there’s so much synchronicity in our life that you just have to look at the signpost of wisdom.
[23:55] How to Reverse These Grooves
The subconscious can be seen in our actions or triggers. And whenever you’re triggered, there’s a deeper root that’s going on.
Start with the event that actually happens. With that trigger always comes an assumption. At the superficial layer, there’s a story you tell yourself, but there’s always an underlying assumption that one goes through.
Once you see the trigger, you can see where else it plays out in your life and how else that happens and where it comes from the patterns.
Figure out your identity statement that’s driving you to make those assumptions. These are limiting beliefs and assumptions that are incorrect. Think about how you can replace it with liberating assumptions. What does wisdom say about the situation?
Our first reactions are not necessarily the right ones. But there is an active learning model – we go through an event, and then we reflect on it, and then we decide whether we handled it right or wrong, and otherwise, we then plan to do something different. Journaling is a process that takes you through these steps so you can figure out a different way.
[30:50] The Writing Process
One of Lisa’s identity statements is “I am not an author.” Part of the reason was that she had dyslexia when she was young.
Then she embarked on the 30-day writing challenge and has gone from nothing to writing a book three months later. For her, the journey itself was so transformative. She also hired an editor for the book. She realized she needed to see the whole thing in its entirety before going back to edit the whole thing.
It’s the power of having accountability and a proven process that even someone analytical can come up with this amazing transformation.
Get the right guide. Whether you want to change your wealth, your health, or relationship, get the right guide.
Pay the money that hurts your back pocket to get the change because it holds you accountable at a level that doesn’t that you will not do.
Episode Resources:
Get to know about Lisa Linfield on www.lisalinfield.com
Grab a copy her book Deep Grooves
Lisa’s podcast: Working Women’s Wealth
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